On Changing Seasons


Right now, I’m sitting outside. It’s a little after 8 p.m., and though I don’t have a mirror, the sunshine’s rays are hitting my nose in a way that feels good and golden, and maybe my skin is glistening a bit from its warmth. You wouldn’t be able to tell tonight, but the seasons are changing.

It wasn’t until about 3 years ago that I heard the phrase that life comes in seasons. Some are warmer, and some are colder than others. Some seasons are meant for joy and overcoming mountains, and some are for sorrow, confusion and mourning.

It’s poetic, really, thinking about our lives cycling through each season. Life is amazing. And then it’s awful. But then it’s amazing again.

But I find it hard to believe that the bad seasons don’t also sow good seeds.

In 2012, I found myself in a figurative and literal cold season. There were a lot of things that made this season difficult, but the hardest part about this cold season was having Raynaud’s syndrome. This meant my hands and feet turned blue and I would painfully lose circulation when the temperatures dropped.

That particular season felt unbearable because of my condition, but I think a lot of us suffer from a figurative Raynaud’s – or something that makes cold season feel extra bad –  as well.

I’ve had seasons, as I’m sure you have too, that were so painful, and so full of heartbreak and confusion, that I thought I’d never recover or emerge. Maybe you’ve thought you’d never feel joy again.

For me, I can look back and see my bad seasons have truly produced good things. My season in 2012 gave me the best friend I’ve ever had, and a home that my heart aches for today.

So maybe you’re in a season where your “Raynaud’s” are hurting you so much that you think things can’t get better. Maybe you feel like you’ll never recover, or this season will leave you scarred with nothing good to show for it.

My friend, the seasons are changing even when you feel like they can’t. And there are better days ahead, even when you believe you’re stuck.


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